Nuggets
- Regardless of how we discipline ourselves, we will become angry at times.
- James told us we were to be slow to anger.
- Instead of sinful anger, we are supposed to be patient.
- Through this patience, we are to strive for understanding.
Devotions in the Maturity Is Composure series
How Do Mature Disciples Control Anger?
How Do Mature Disciples Control Envy?
In the last devotion, we looked at conflict. A lot of the conflict can come from — or produce — anger. This devotion looks at anger separately to see what anger is acceptable, and what anger isn’t.
Let's Put It into Context
Composure is a mental steadiness, keeping a even temper under stress.
We each have a spirit that encompasses thoughts, passions, and emotions. Our spirit is that core of us that houses our character. It is, essentially, the us in us.
We need to control that spirit — not have it control us. If our spirit controls us, Satan is controlling us.
Boston described anger as a commotion in the spirit caused by an actual or perceived injury. The Homilist noted that anger is an expression of love, making it “… as holy a passion as love.”
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That make sense, doesn’t it? Something has to mean something to us in order to elicit that intense of an emotion.
Slow to Anger
“A patient person shows great understanding, but a quick-tempered one promotes foolishness. A tranquil heart is life to the body, but jealousy is rottenness to the bones” (Prov. 14: 29-30 CSB)
“A quick-tempered person acts foolishly, and one who schemes is hated” (Prov. 14: 17 CSB)
“A person’s insight gives him patience, and his virtue is to overlook an offense” (Prov. 19: 11 CSB)
Anger brings a side helping of unhappiness. Regardless of how we discipline ourselves, we will become angry at times.
I think a lot of times we forget that anger, itself, is not a sin (Homilist). Boston reminded us that anger against sin is acceptable, because we are honoring God. In fact, Arnot said that an anger against sin is the only justifiable anger.
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Unfortunately, most instances of anger are sin (Arnot). When does anger become sinful?
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Anger becomes sinful when, even though it may be just, it is excessive or misdirected in some way. It is always sinful when it is unjust or without cause. It becomes sinful when it causes other sinful actions.
God doesn’t want the anger to take over the city, as we talked about in the last devotion. Anger can roll along picking up people as it moves, until it has engulfed the whole city.
We all know that it is very possible for anger to increase. Sometimes, it seems anger takes on a life of its own and just grows exponentially.
James told us we were to be slow to anger. “Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God” (Jas. 1: 19-20 ESV).
Try Patience Instead
Instead of sinful anger, we are supposed to be patient. Patience is a steadfast endurance in opposition without losing a positive attitude.
Companion to that is to be our meekness. Meekness is a personality trait exhibiting a mild or moderate disposition that places dependence on God.
Patience is important because anger (or wrath, as it used to be called) can lead to harsh words. Arnot wrote, “Wrath generates grievous words, and grievous words aggravate the wrath that produced them.
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We have to control anger. Boston wrote, “Anger is a servant to the meek, but a master to the passionate.”
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Through this patience, we are to strive for understanding. When we stop to determine the triggers of the anger, we can see what ways we can serve them. Service is an act based on belief in God that comes from a response of worship by acknowledging His power through our submission.
Making the Connections
We have to realize how detrimental anger can be. At times, we can brush aside someone’s anger. If it isn’t an important issue or we don’t feel something to the level the angry person does, we tend to write it off.
That refusal to acknowledge someone else’s feeling can destroy the relationship — usually while it is escalating it to an all-out war.
Anger can also take a huge toll. Along with what it does to us physically, it hurts society as a whole. Boston is correct when he said that it clouds reason.
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Just like everything else in this world, Satan has taken anger and corrupted it. He has distorted it until it furthers his objective to divide and conquer us.
There is only one answer for us – Jesus Christ. He showed us how to not respond in anger. He showed us true love. He defeated Satan.
How Do We Apply This?
How do we turn away from and control anger? The Homilist suggested that we learn to defer our anger. I think counting to ten before reacting would fall under that category. Walking away would also.
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I have a Scarlett box. A co-worker gave me a box years ago when she retired. Our supervisor had given it to her.
The instructions were that, when I was angry or overwhelmed – or anything I couldn’t handle at that exact moment – I was supposed to put it in the Scarlett box.
Why did I call it the Scarlett box? You know, that last scene in Gone with the Wind. Scarlett says, “After all, tomorrow is another day!”
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My co-worker said I was supposed to put my anger, my upset, my feelings of inadequacy – whatever – into the box when I couldn’t deal with them. I was supposed to leave them in there until I was ready to deal.
Think about getting your own box for your issues.
We have to deal with anger appropriately as it comes. We have to put on our patient and understanding hats.
Horton wrote that we can’t allow anger character. Our character is supposed to be like God’s. He is peace and love.
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It comes down to a choice again. We will have to choose whether or not we are going to let anger roll over us. We have to choose if we will react in patience.
We need to choose God. We need to choose to imitate Jesus.
Gracious Heavenly Father. Forgive us for disobeying You and allowing Satan to gain control of this world. He has perverted anger so that he tries to divide us. Help us to react the way Jesus would – with love and patience. Help us to imitate Him. Amen.
What do you think?
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